DAY 49: VALUE

49 days ago I began my 100-days self retreat project. Tomorrow I’ll be half way through. I have been thinking how to proceed with its second half. Few ideas that I am considering:

  • Drop fatloss objective, get stronger, enjoy variety of foods eating out.
  • Go back to recording videos (probably weekly rather than daily)
  • Stop recording or writing, still keep filling in the spreadsheet.

I am going to decide tomorrow. Today my priority is to go to bed early, reclaim good sleeping patterns which I lost a couple of weeks ago. Before my friends arrived, I was in a perfect harmony. I am actually glad Mr Bolo (a qui) pointed out himself that he was lacking his private space (cultivated while in Slovakia) during his Asia trip. I am glad because I feel less of a dick blaming others for my chaos. Clearly, bad sleeping and eating patterns are correlated and it should be my priority to improve on that as a matter of urgency.

I was looking for something out there in the streets and casino (didn’t bet, ez) last night again. Still managed to do my workout although mentally it was kind of forced. I am aching in my lower back because of the game last night, in my legs because of some cheeby who kicked me and in my mind because of existence. Now just enjoying Set 3 (bbq spicy chicken set with a lot of rice) from my favourite hawker at Holland Village.

It is so difficult to get back on track but there is nothing more important at this moment. Peace of mind during sadness and exhaustion is surely valuable but peace of mind during happiness, clarity of mind and optimal performance is even more valuable.

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